Now that Rogue One: A Star Wars Story’s canonization is complete, we look ahead to Star Wars Episode VIII.  The annual Star Wars release once again premieres in December, which should be renamed the Month of Dathomir, since other December movies will require a Mother Talzin resuscitation.

As much as I enjoyed Rogue One, it was not a fully satisfying addition given the breath of the Star Wars storyline.

Here’s What’s Wrong with Rogue One: A Star Wars Story.

So, I’m hoping Episode VIII is strong in the Force, and resists the cheapest of temptations, especially with one of the biggest mysteries:

Who is Rey?

First, here’s who I hope Rey is NOT:

A Skywalker

A common fan theory is that she is Luke’s daughter, making her Kylo Ren’s cousin.  I hope this is not the case.

The Force Awakens was A New Hope all-over-again.  Another Skywalker family reveal will be like Starkiller base: it’s different, but come on, it’s still another Death Star.  Too many guys making way too much money for us to see another Skywalker genealogy story.

It would also require a very awkward backstory-building that wouldn’t even make sense.  Luke is a True Jedi, like his masters Obi-Wan and Yoda.  He is more his mother than his father in disposition, which is why he was able to resist Palpatine.  To say he had a child will require a major character rebuild.

A Solo

Another theory is that she is Han and Leia’s other child, and of course Kylo Ren’s sister.  I would accept this more than a Skywalker story, but it’s limiting.  It’s Rey trying to redeem Ben, in a Galactic sibling intervention.  Again, this is derivative of the son-father conflict we saw in Episode IV-VI.  We need something new.  We need something bigger than another family soap-opera.

A Kenobi

The wildest theory is that she is somehow related to Obi-Wan Kenobi.  Perhaps a grandchild of Obi-Wan and Satine Kryze….

Nope, don’t go there.  Obi-Wan is a Jedi Master who reaches a state that only a few Jedi ever reached.  In other words, the only thing bursting out of his pants was his lightsaber.  To take him out of character for a cheap surprise is sacrilege.

Who I hope Rey is:

A force-sensitive orphan who was chosen to train with Luke.  But before her training had begun, Luke hid her on Jakku since he foresaw the rise of the Knights of Ren and Kylo Ren’s turn to the Dark Side.  He knew that someone had to be protected to one day rise and challenge the new evil, Ren and Snoke.  Luke received help from Leia, and her loyal servant, Lor San Tekka, remained on Jakku to watch over Rey and to one day, provide a means for her to find Luke.

And who is Rey’s family?  The only family she knew as a child – Luke, Leia, San Tekka and the other Jedi younglings and Padawans, including Ben Solo.

So, she is a Skywalker and a Solo, and at the same time, she is not.

Anyway, something like this is what I’d like to see rather than the soap-opera-ish connections where everyone is somehow connected to everyone else.